A Final Word of Gardening Inspiration from a Realistic Gardener.

Unlike other therapists at this practice, I am not a gardener. I do not have a green thumb. Yet every spring, I am outside with hopes renewed, this year will be my year.

Every spring the same vision of this lush garden, so beautiful that the neighbors weep in awe. Then every summer, my garden flounders.

My garden, like every project I undertake, begins with an overabundance of enthusiasm and then inevitably withers. This year, I am trying something different. This year I am taking my inspiration from the firecracker bush in my front yard.

You see, it is not in a great location. It has been cut down before and is growing haphazardly under a bigger bush. Yet, it is thriving. It doesn’t care that it should “look different” than it does. It doesn’t care that it is not in an ideal location. It doesn’t care that it wasn’t supposed to be growing where it is. All the plant cares about is using the energy it has to find whatever sunshine it can.

It’s not using its limited energy to change the plants around it. It’s not using its limited energy to try and look like the ideal firecracker bush. It’s not using its limited energy to change its fundamental nature. It is using its energy to grow in a way that allows it to thrive despite its challenges. It uses its energy to reach for the sunshine.

We spend so much of our time and energy trying to change things about ourselves that do not need to be changed. If it is not hurting ourselves or someone else, does it need to change? Or do we use our limited energy to make it work for us? I am always going to be easily distracted. I can spend my energy lamenting my inability to stay on task. Or I can figure out ways that I can adjust to make my idiosyncrasies work for me. I can spend my limited energy being frustrated with myself for not being able to remember everything on my to-do list, or I can add things to my phone calendar so that I get a pop- up reminder. What is a better use of my energy? Trying to change how my brain works? Or embracing how my brain works so that my energy can be channeled into something more rewarding.

This is where I am supposed to tell you that this year, I researched hardy plants that do not need attention or anything specific to live and mindfully planted a garden that will thrive despite my lack of green thumb.

That is not the case.

I wandered through the plants and picked ones that I liked without any real plan. I am sure that despite my enthusiasm my gardening skills and attention span will inevitably lead to a rather dilapidated-looking garden by the end of summer. At which point I will laugh at myself and move on.

I am not going to waste energy being frustrated at my lack of gardening skills nor am I going to deprive myself of the joy of gardening due to it not being an area in which I naturally thrive.

This year, I am going to use my limited energy to reach for the sunshine.

-Kathe Glancy, MSW